As humans, we have a fundamental need to interact with others. It is as essential to our well-being as eating, sleeping or keeping warm. To illustrate the power of human connection, suicide survivors have shared that intentions to take their life have been interrupted by an interaction. Is a conversation the easiest way to save a life?

Opportunities to Connect Are Declining

As a species, we are social creatures. While we may enjoy our own company and quiet time, we have an innate need to connect with other people. Neurological studies suggest that the reason we have large brains is to process the information required for complex social networks and interactions.

Yet, the opportunities to connect with others are declining. With online services, automation, self-service facilities and AI, we can conduct the majority of daily activities without interacting with others. Even if you want to connect and communicate with colleagues or companies, you are often directed to a digital solution.

In the Government’s Community Life Survey, 7% of UK adults reported feeling lonely often or always. And, prolonged loneliness is associated with declining physical and mental health.

Strike Up a Conversation

It is common to feel that you haven’t got time to stop and chat, to make a call or send a message. You might think about contacting a friend, family member, colleague or customer, but something else comes up and the moment has passed. It may not seem important, yet feedback from suicide survivors suggests the opposite.

Samaritans surveyed individuals who had reached a crisis point and had suicidal intent. Of the survivors:

• 60% said their actions were interrupted by communication from a friend or family member
• 17% said their actions were interrupted by communication with a stranger

In many cases, it is unlikely that these individuals were aware the person they spoke to, messaged, smiled at or complimented felt suicidal. They simply took the opportunity to connect, and in that moment, they may have saved a life.

There’s no better way for me to encourage you to strike up a conversation. It might take a minute or two out of your day. You may feel that a stranger will think you are odd if you talk to them. Equally, you might feel concerned that your manager will reprimand you for chatting. However, this small interaction could make a difference, even if it’s just making someone’s day.

This World Suicide Prevention Day, can I encourage you to spark up a conversation with at least one person that you wouldn’t normally connect with?

Concerned About Someone?

What if a customer or colleague says or does something that causes you concern?

In workplace conversations, a customer or colleague might say or do something that strikes you as odd or concerning. Don’t ignore it. Take the opportunity to speak with them.

It’s common to feel uncomfortable at this point. What should you say, and what if you say the wrong thing? The easy option is to put it off and avoid ‘opening a can of worms’. Yet, taking an interest in someone and listening is potentially the most supportive and kind thing you can do. They may not want to talk and might be dismissive of your attempt to interact, but you’ve made a connection.

Your conversation starter could be along the lines of:

“I was concerned about what you just did (or said), what’s going on?”
“You mentioned something that concerned me, so I want to ask how you are today.”
“It sounds like you’ve got a lot going on, do you want to tell me about it?”
“We’ve not caught up in a while, have you got time to grab a cuppa?”

Then listen to their response. If they say things are ‘fine’ or they’ve not got time to stop, don’t pressurise them into talking. However, you could email or message afterwards to let them know they can get in touch if they want to.

What if Someone Shares Life Challenges or Suicidal Thoughts?

If they do open up and share difficulties or suicidal thoughts, you don’t need to be a trained therapist to respond. Simply listen without interruption. When they stop talking, stay with them. If you want to say more, the Samaritans’ website offers some phrases that can continue the conversation.

If appropriate, you can encourage them to contact a specialist service, such as Samaritans, Papyrus or Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) via a website, phone or text.

Remember, human connection is a basic need that many people are lacking. Your interaction equates to giving a thirsty person a glass of water. It’s a small gesture, yet it is essential to life. Will you make it your mission to include more human connections in your day?

To equip your frontline team with confidence and competence in managing suicidal customer conversations, we offer in-house training and open courses.